Tessie D

I called in sick to work yesterday. I’m not going to work today either.  I just can’t. Not after what happened on Monday night. 

Alex locked me in the walk-in freezer. 

I know I’m not crazy or blowing this out of proportion. I know what happened. 

I went in to work on Monday night, and everything was fine. We were slow, but I worked on the floor with Eric, a super cute college guy with super bright red hair. Everyone calls him “Cheeto.” He’s one of the funniest people I’ve ever met, and he makes more money in tips than all of us put together. The elderly ladies love him because he smiles at them, comes over to their side of the table first, and complements something that you can tell they care about but they’ve put a lot of time and effort into, like their their hair or clothing. He doesn’t sound insincere or sarcastic at all. He just smiles and tells them how pretty they look this evening. 

Anyway, I was working with Eric. Everything was going great, and I was finishing up my shift so that I could clock out. Eric had a customer with a birthday, so he asked me if I’d go to the back and get a cake from the walk-in so that we could sing. 

I hate going into the walk-in. I’m claustrophobic. So, if I have to go in there, I will either prop the door open, or I’ll swing it wide, run in, grab what I came for, and run out before the door ever closes. I know it sounds ridiculous, that I sound ridiculous. But, I’ve always been claustrophobic ever since I was a little girl, and I got stuck with Momma in a gas station bathroom. The door handle must’ve broken or the latch got stuck because all I remember is standing by the door and watching the handle turn and turn in her hand. And, I started screaming at the top of my lungs. I couldn’t stop screaming, and Momma slapped me across the face. It was the only time she’s ever hit me. She said she was sorry later but that I was hysterical and she didn’t know what to do to get me to stop screaming. 

Ever since, I’ve been afraid of bathrooms, elevators, and small spaces. And, lately, walk-in freezers.

So, I either prop the door or run in so quickly that the door never shuts. The door can never shut. 

Except, this time, it did. 

The cakes weren’t where we usually keep them right by the front. They were in the back. By the time I saw them, grabbed one, and turned to run, the door had shut. 

The freezer immediately went dark, and I could feel my heart starting to race. I reached out for the door release, and it was right where I knew it would be. I pushed on it, and I heard the latch click, unlocking the door. The door was supposed to open and there was supposed to be light pouring in. 

But it didn’t. The door didn’t open. 

It couldn’t have been more than a second or two, but it felt like time had stopped. I pushed on the knob a second, third, fourth, fifth time, but the door didn’t move. It didn’t open. 

I could hear the latch clicking but nothing happened. 

I thought for a second that I might throw up. I could feel the panic in every muscle of my body and the tears starting to well up in my eyes. I started shaking uncontrollably, from either the cold or the panic or both.

I didn’t know what to do. I was standing in the dark, in the cold, and I thought I was going to die. 

And, I just started screaming. Banging on the door and screaming. It couldn’t have been more than a few seconds. I know that. But, it didn’t feel that way. 

Suddenly the door opened and light poured in. Eric and Alex were standing there. I bolted through the open door and past them, falling to the floor at the feet—my legs giving way to the panic. 

I couldn’t help it. I just started sobbing. 

“The door wouldn’t open. The door wouldn’t open,” I kept repeating. 

Eric bent down. I could tell he’d been breathing heavily and all the color had drained from his face. He grabbed me by the shoulders and tried to direct my attention toward him.

“Look at me. You’re okay. Look at me. Tess, you’re okay.” 

But, I couldn’t stop crying. “It wouldn’t open. The door wouldn’t open.” 

“There’s a handle in there. Were you pushing it? Did you push on the door?” Eric asked. 

“It wouldn’t open. I wouldn’t open.” It was all that I could think to say. 

“Take some deep breaths, Tess. Try to calm down,” Eric said. 

I looked up, hearing Alex for the first time. Alex was standing there, looking down at me with an odd expression on his face, “You’re fine. The door is fine. Calm down. You just didn’t push on it.” 

I realized suddenly what I must’ve looked like. “I want to go home,” I said, trying to stand up. 

“Easy there. Take it slow,” Eric said, helping me to my feet. “I don’t think you should be driving right now. Let’s calm down first.” 

Alex agreed, “Eric’s right. You shouldn’t be driving. Hang out here and then I’ll drive you home.”

“No!” I said suddenly. Surprised, I caught myself. “No,” I swallowed. “I want to go home. I can drive myself.” 

“Hold up. Let’s get you something to drink so you can calm down a bit more. Then we’ll figure out how to get you home,” Eric said.

I didn’t know what to say to that so I let him lead me away from the freezer, through the swinging door to the front of the restaurant, toward a table in the corner. It didn’t seem like anyone in the dining room had heard me screaming. Everything seemed entirely normal as if nothing had happened. 

I sat down in a chair and put my head in my hands. 

“Sit here, I’ll be right back. Let me check on my tables, and I’ll grab you something to drink,” Eric said while turning to go. 

He walked off and Alex stood at the end of the table watching me. 

“You feeling better now?” He asked, his tone flat.

“Yes,” I whispered. 

“Good. Because that was embarrassing.” 

I could feel the tears welling up but I took a deep breath and the urge to cry passed.

“I’m sorry. I couldn’t get the door to open. It wouldn’t open.” 

“There was nothing wrong with the door. I don’t know what to tell you,” he said and walked away toward the front of the restaurant. 

I sat there for a second, not knowing what to do. I just wanted to go home. 

I stood up and started walking to the front. I met Eric on his way back to where I was sitting, “Here, I got you a drink. The sugar will make you feel better.”

“Thanks, can you put it on the table? I’m going to go to the bathroom.” 

I walked back up toward the front and ducked into the kitchen. I grabbed my purse from the locker where I’d stowed it earlier and walked back through the dry stock area, past the walk-in freezer, and to the back door. I wanted to go home, and I wasn’t waiting around for Alex or anyone else to drive me. 

Driving home, I kept thinking about what had happened, replaying it over and over in my mind. I know that I was pushing the door handle. I must’ve pushed it at least five times. I heard it unlatch each time. But, the door didn’t move. 

Alex and Eric opened the door. But, only Eric was out of breath. Only Eric looked like he’d run from another part of the restaurant to the back. 

Alex wasn’t worried. Alex wasn’t concerned. Instead, Alex seemed almost mad at me. 

I know what happened. I don’t have any proof except that I just know it. Alex was standing on the other side of the door, holding it shut. I know he could hear me screaming, and he held the door closed.